This story is called "
Target" or "
Four kids and a Mom"
Once upon a Saturday there was a mom with four young girls who had many errands to run. First she went to Costco, but she forgot what time they opened and arrived 20 minutes early. Since the gas pump couldn't read her card, she decided to go to Target first.
All seemed well at first with 8 month old infant strapped in the bjorn, a busy 2 year old sitting in the seat and two five year olds walking by her side. All was well until the two year old beguiled the naive mom into letting said two-year old get out of the cart and walk. Now the mother really shouldn't have been naive about two-year old behavior because many times past she had sworn that she would never take said two-year old to the store ever again. But mothers have short memories...
The trip was to be a quick one, with just four things to buy: hair elastics, baby food, freezer bags for milk, and bottle liners. While in the hair product aisle the beguiling two-year old took off down the aisle.
The first 5-year old said "I will go get her."
The mother agreed and continued to the next aisle to load her cart with baby food. The second 5-year old said "I will go and find my two sisters," and off she ran.
The mother was alone for about 2 minutes when the second 5-year old exlaimed "I can't find either of my sisters!"
Shortly thereafter, the first 5-year old returned and said "I can't find the 2-year old!"
So the mother and the two 5-year olds headed down the aisle to find the busy and most beguiling 2-year old. Lucy for them, they didn't have to search long, for bounding down the next aisle was the 2-year old at the hand of a Target employee. "There's my MOM!" screamed the 2-year old with delight, and quick as a flash she let go of the employee's hand and excitedly ran to join her family.
The mother thanked the red-shirted employee and placed the 2-year old in the basket. Problem solved. She headed over to the baby section to purchase the bags and liners. Right as she rolled in front of the bottle section, one of the 5-year olds started to do the potty dance and shouted excitedly "I have to go to the bathroom... RIGHT NOW!"
"Do you remember where the bathroom is?" asked the mother, calculating that she could grab the liners and bags and walk fast enough to watch the said 5-year old enter the bathroom.
"Yes... right in front of the registers," and off she ran.
Now you probably think that mother is irresponsible for letting her 5-year old go to the bathroom by herself, and thinking back, I agree. However, mother thought to herself "I can pay for this stuff before she even gets finished in the bathroom, and it is 9 o'clock on a Saturday, the store is mostly empty and most crazies are probably still in bed."
The second 5-year old said "I'm going to the bathroom with my sister," and off she ran.
The mother found the items she needed and headed down the aisle when over the loud speakers she heard "Attention Target shoppers, will Neglegent Mother of Four Children, please come to the Service Desk."
The mother used her long legs to reach the desk in two leaps and there was the second 5-year old chatting with the friendly Target employee. The mother said "what happened? Where is your sister?"
The second 5-year old said "I went to the bathroom to find her, but she wasn't there. I couldn't remember where you were so I came here to ask the man to help me."
The mother was grateful for her logical child, realizing that she had never instructed the children that should they get lost they should go to the service desk or registers. Only problem was, where was the first 5-year old? The mother didn't even have time to panic because out bounded the first 5-year old from the jewelery section.
"Why didn't you go to the bathroom?" asked the Mother.
"I did," said the first 5-year old, "and then I found you here."
The mother didn't understand the logic, but she was grateful to have all three children back again. She was embarassed to have lost three of the four kids within 20 minutes, and was pretty convinced that the only reason she still had the baby was because she was strapped on to the mother.
It was an eventful shopping trip. The mother was crazy enough to continue on to Costco, which was much less eventful. But she is happy to report that no children were lost, except a beguiling 2-year old who convinced her mother that she would stay with her THIS time, she promised.
Some people never learn...